A Star Is Born

4 out of 5 stars

Beautiful, just beautiful!👏

That Racoon can direct! Who’d have thought?!🩝

Oscars right here! Yes,
 Cooper, of course
 Gaga,
 yep! Just keep ’em coming
 Elliott? Sure,
 Röuelli draa, and just keep ’em coming


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BlacKkKlansman

3 out of 5 stars

Well, it’s a movie.
A solid movie.
A solid Spike Lee movie.
Sorry, a solid Spike Lee «joint».
An important joint.
Presenting a mind-blowing premise based on true events.
About some very important issues.
Making some interesting points


in the most generic way imaginable (other than being somewhat of a period piece).

But other than that rather mediocre, imho. (#OscarBait)

Birdman

4.5 out of 5 stars

Too lazy (and too drnk right now) to write a proper review (and don’t have the time to get into details, I have to get even more drnkn in a minute), but after my «Roma» “Review” I feel that I have to show that I still have some sense of proper movie-appreriationtiaion for some to like SOME artsy-fartsy movies!

I’m just rewatching «Birdman» and wanted to let you know, that it’s great and you absolutely have to watch it! Like now!!!

I problaly shouldnt wirt e this but it’s really graet, where are those really grat movies now? Frget «Rpoma», watch «Birdman»! BIIIIRDMAAAN!!!

Lets get some more Oscars over here, plse, bevore «Roma« gets, tehm!

Dad?! Dad!?

Roma

2 out of 5 stars


To be honest, I didn’t plan to out myself as a hater (again, after last year’s Academy Awards disaster that was «The Shape Of Water»), but with the Oscars warming up and 10 nominations for this year’s frontrunner, I feel forced to reveal my two cents about «Roma – The Watching of Paint Dry».

Full disclosure: I like color. I like it in paintings, comics, in magazines, on flowers, even on vegetables: I like broccoli or pickles, which are green. Peter Jackson even coloured World War I to make it more fun, for cryin’ out loud!

But I digress


Netflix’ Oscar vehicle «Roma» is like Alfonso CuarĂłn’s earlier multiple Oscar-winner «Gravity» but not set in space. And with the difference that I found «Roma – The Emperor’s New Clothes» to be boring and that I didn’t like it. And it doesn’t even come in color. And as I mentioned earlier, I like color.

One could state that «Roma – The CCTV Experience» is like «Children of Men», another masterpiece by Alfonso CuarĂłn, but not set in the future. What sets it apart from «Children of Men» is that «Roma – Arthouse, Schmarthouse» doesn’t have a story. I like story; it’s high up on my list of priorities: I even live in a 26 story building.

I’d even go so fare to compare «Roma – They Might Be Your Memories, But Why Should I Care?» with CuarĂłn’s «Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban», another great one that is entertaining and fully satisfying; unlike «Roma – Fast Forwarding Through The Second Half». I like to be entertained. And I like what I like.

In conclusion, 
I wished «Roma – I Already Miss The McRaclette» was more like «Y Tu MamĂĄ TambiĂ©n»: I’ve never watched it but I heard it’s great.

McRaclette – I’ll see you in another life when we are both fat.

Glass

3.5 out of 5 stars

For a moment there I really thought M. Night Shyamalan was finally back for good in all his former glory. But then «Glass» got a little clumsy and lost me somewhere along the way – just to win me back in the end.

As enjoyable and original the movie might be in general, Shyamalan once again tries a little too hard for my taste, lacking the elegance of his earliest work and for that matter, the charm of «Split», the movie that got me back on board for this one in the first place.

(In case you didn’t know, «Split» and «Unbreakable» are absolutely mandatory to see before «Glass» – it’s a whole thing now).

And though I love me some James McAvoy (I got so lucky to experience his wonderful stage performance as «Macbeth»), I’m sad to say, less «Horde» would have been more this time around.

All in all, revisiting Mr. Glass’ Meta-Comic-Super-Hero-World (almost two decades after «Unbreakable») in the weakest but still solid part of the trilogy, is absolutely worth its admission price.

M. Night really seems to be redeeming himself lately. Let’s be nice and give him just a little bit more time, he’ll get there again


James McAvoy in Macbeth (Trafalgar Studios London, 2013)

Black Mirror: «Bandersnatch» or why I broke up with Netflix

4.5 out of 5 stars

For a few days I was very hesitant to watch this latest episode of «Black Mirror» where one can choose how the story goes. I don’t want to work for my TV entertainment, I have video-games for that, I reckoned.

But, oh man, did «Black Mirror» prove me wrong! «Bandersnatch» showed once again that «Black Mirror» remains one of the most entertaining, innovative and original series out there, this time turning it all up to 11 and the whole «pick your own adventure» concept on its head.

But «Bandersnatch» did it in such an ingenious and jaw-dropping way that it makes most of the latest Netflix exclusives sorely stay out as the lazy, uninspired, cheap crap that they probably are (IMHO).

So after having finished all available episodes of the great «The Good Place» and «Rick and Morty» (both not Netflix exclusives, mind you) and the admittedly pretty good «The Kominsky Method», the sensible thing to do after being extremely bored out by «Bird Box», «Next Gen», Russel Brand’s latest special, the publicity stunt that was «The Cloverfield Paradox» and, sad to say, even Alex Garland’s «Annihilation», seems to be just leaving Netflix for a while.

(And the cancellation of the Marvel series and the rather disappointing «Star Trek: Discovery» didn’t help either).

That’ll teach them


Aquaman

1 out of 5 stars

The only good thing I can write about «Aquaman» is that it ends. (Which is true in more than one way; the final 10 minutes of the movie where almost enjoyable).

But since this appalling piece of crab (yes, I just wrote that) presented itself as such an offending incoherent mess, I really don’t feel like making an effort here, either. So let’s just open the floodgates, shall we:

  • Can we let the DC Extended Universe die now, please? At this point it’s just intolerable cruelty.
  • This movie has the pacing and elegance of a very bad «Family Guy» episode.
  • «Uncanny Valley – The Movie»
  • You know you’re in trouble when Patrick Wilson steals the movie. (Not that he’s bad or anything, but you know, he’s Patrick Wilson).
  • On the bright side, «The Shape of Water» is no longer my most hated water-related film of late.
  • Poor Jason Momoa wasn’t given anything to work with whatsoever.
  • You know you’re in trouble when I think Jason Momoa was underused. (Not that he’s bad or anything, but you know, he’s Jason Momoa).
  • This movie feels longer than Willem Dafoe’s dong. And it’s almost as painful to watch as its scene in Lars von Trier’s «Antichrist».
  • Like watching eight awful movies in parallel – while sitting on a trident, and not the comfortable way.
  • You had to cram «Black Manta» into this, did you? BTW, have you even seen «Black Panther»?
  • You know you’re in trouble when Dolph Lundgren’s hair becomes the most fascinating thing in the scene.
  • Sicily, reaally? You don’t say?!
  • Harry Gregson-Williams has a brother?!
  • Directed by James Wan does this garbage end?
  • Amber please stop, it Heards!
  • I’ve seen way better versions of this made by children in the winter. It’s called «Snowman».
  • I’ve seen way better versions of this made by dogs in the winter. It’s called «yellow snow».
  • I’ve seen way better versions of this made by my anus in the winter. It’s called «shit».
  • Aw, just Faqu,man!

Mad Men

4.5 out of 5 stars

Better late than never, I finally got to the end of this beautiful show yesterday and I’m still flabbergasted about just how masterfully the last season was crafted and the series’ top-notch quality overall.

Though «Mad Men» sometimes tended to be on the earnest, almost (almost!) dry and depressing side of things,  I’ve always loved the series thanks to its social relevance, the rich characters and its on-point art direction, cinematography and music.

Where other shows fail, «Mad Men’s» seventh and last season feels fresh, positive and satisfying as hell and, above all, cathartic and extremely enjoyable. For a program that serious and ambitious, that means a lot!

So, for all the fans of inspiring storytelling,  compelling drama, fine humour and perfect characters who have been living under a rock since 2007, check it out and proof me wrong.

Don’t buy them BeatsX earphones!

1 out of 5 stars

They are C R A P !

It’s almost sad to say, but the sound quality of the BeatsX by Dre earphones would be very decent, and imho they are way cooler than the standard AirPods.  And since the brand belongs to Apple they pair nicely with the iPhone and Apple Watch without always having to go through the bluetooth-settings  – AS LONG AS THE DAMN THINGS WORK!!!

But in the last SIX MONTHS I’ve gone through two pairs now until they just broke again. A blinking red LED error code all over again. No firmware update nor a reset would help. When I replaced the first pair the nice man at the Apple store told me this was not an unusual problem.

So, Dre, you might be a Doctor (which I doubt), but your BeatsX earphones suck balls! And Apple, f*ck you, too!